People can be quite stupid. I'm not saying I'm the sharpest tool in the shed but some people make me look like a bloody genius. As my Econ 101 professor once said (in a thick Iranian accent), "Stupidity is really a very common problem. It is pretty amazing, the amount of time you spend correcting the errors of stupid people." He took the words right out of my mouth. We all have our moments, but honestly, if you've asked any of the questions below (and I'm sure most of you have), look in the mirror and slap yourself. Hard.
1. (At a movie theatre) What are you doing here?
Response: I came here hoping to see your pretty face.
2. (After you've lost something) Where did you last put it?
Response: Up your bum.
3. (As you're coughing up your lungs and blowing your nose) Are you sick?
Response: No, I'm just getting into character for my upcoming movie.
4. (After someone calls you at 4am on a weekday) Oh, did I wake you up?
Response: No, I was up hoping your lovely voice would disrupt my sleep.
5. (After you walk inside, drenched) Is it raining outside?
Response: No, I just got peed on by the doorman. And I liked it.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Sounds n things
A lot of people often criticize me for liking songs without paying attention to, or appreciating the lyrics. While this is sometimes the case, I still like to listen to songs for the simple reason that they sound good. My ears approve of these songs and my brain agrees. It's sort of like food from taco bell where you don't really know what it is, but you like it anyway. So to prove my point, here are a few songs that I like a lot in languages that I don't understand at all. They still sound great and I have the excuse of not needing to understand the lyrics because, well, they're in a language I don't understand at all. I just said that. And for all of you that are going to look up translations and tell me I would like the songs even more if I read them, all I can say to you is this.
1. Praan by Gary Schyman (Background music for the Where the Hell is Matt? video)
Language: Bengali
Interesting Fact: The words are actually an excerpt from Gitanjali by Rabindranath Tagore, who won the Nobel Prize for Literature in 1913).
2. Kaze Wo Atsumete by Happy End (From the Lost in Translation Soundtrack)
Language: Japanese
Interesting Fact: The song is from the 70's even though it sounds pretty contemporary. Also, for some reason there is little to no information about the song on the internet. The link is not the original but it's all I could find...so much for youtube having everything.
3. Neunundneunzig Luft Balons by Nena
Language: German
Interesting Fact: The cold-war protest song was so named because the guitarist saw balloons being released at a Rolling Stones concert and wondered what might happen if they floated over the Berlin Wall.
4. Mi'Ma'amakim by The Idan Raichel Project
Language: Hebrew
Interesting Fact: The chap was conscripted to the Israeli army and played in the army rock band and toured military bases.
5. Now We Are Free by Lisa Gerrard and Hanz Zimmer (From the Gladiator Soundtrack)
Language: Hebrew
Interesting Fact: Hans Zimmer, wearing a dark suit and playing the keyboard, appears in the video to 'Video Killed the Radio Star' by The Buggles which was also the first video to ever be aired on MTV.
6. Volare by Gipsy Kings
Language: Calo
Interesting Fact: They sing in Calo, not Spanish. Also, if you ever play Volare at a party, everyone will sing slong. Everyone.
7. Didi by Khaled
Language: Arabic
Interesting Fact: He's called Cheb Khaled which means "Young Man Khaled" even though he's quite an old chap now.
1. Praan by Gary Schyman (Background music for the Where the Hell is Matt? video)
Language: Bengali
Interesting Fact: The words are actually an excerpt from Gitanjali by Rabindranath Tagore, who won the Nobel Prize for Literature in 1913).
2. Kaze Wo Atsumete by Happy End (From the Lost in Translation Soundtrack)
Language: Japanese
Interesting Fact: The song is from the 70's even though it sounds pretty contemporary. Also, for some reason there is little to no information about the song on the internet. The link is not the original but it's all I could find...so much for youtube having everything.
3. Neunundneunzig Luft Balons by Nena
Language: German
Interesting Fact: The cold-war protest song was so named because the guitarist saw balloons being released at a Rolling Stones concert and wondered what might happen if they floated over the Berlin Wall.
4. Mi'Ma'amakim by The Idan Raichel Project
Language: Hebrew
Interesting Fact: The chap was conscripted to the Israeli army and played in the army rock band and toured military bases.
5. Now We Are Free by Lisa Gerrard and Hanz Zimmer (From the Gladiator Soundtrack)
Language: Hebrew
Interesting Fact: Hans Zimmer, wearing a dark suit and playing the keyboard, appears in the video to 'Video Killed the Radio Star' by The Buggles which was also the first video to ever be aired on MTV.
6. Volare by Gipsy Kings
Language: Calo
Interesting Fact: They sing in Calo, not Spanish. Also, if you ever play Volare at a party, everyone will sing slong. Everyone.
7. Didi by Khaled
Language: Arabic
Interesting Fact: He's called Cheb Khaled which means "Young Man Khaled" even though he's quite an old chap now.
Sunday, March 22, 2009
People are people
I sometimes try to take photos of people and usually don't do too well. This might be part of the reason why I don't really like being in pictures myself. So anyway, I was going through files on my computer and I came across these that I think are half decent...
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Shameless Advertisement #1
So I don't usually do this but every once in a while you come across something that makes you toss the rules out the window and say, "Yes I can." That something is called Dogmatic. Located in the northwestern corner of Union Square lies this temple of goodness. I walked by it a couple of weeks ago and made a mental note to return. I didn't realise that by not going in then I was depriving myself of immense pleasure.
What is this Dogmatic nonsense you ask? I pity your ignorance - not for the sake of not knowing but for the sake of your stomach that has not yet experienced the pleasure of a Dogmatic dog. They call it the Gourmet Sausage System. But I think it's so much more. That three word tag-line, while catchy and all, hardly does justice to the joy that this place brings. Here's one of the many reasons why you should go to Dogmatic (I don't care where in the world you are):
1. The Wall Mural
It basically shows you the how the meat gets from the farm to Union Square. But no, it doesn't just show a pig, a slaughter-house, a sausage maker, a truck and the restaurant. Oh no no no. How silly of you to even think of such a thing you creativity-lacking fool. Robots carrying sausages, men lifting buildings, flying trucks dropping baguettes, oh my!
2. Home-made Sodas
The lemon-lime tastes like fresh-lime soda you get in India, the ginger soda tastes like really good ginger ale and the coconut tastes like nothing you've tasted before but something you wish you had invented.
3. The Communal Table
I'm not usually a fan of communal seating but they got it right. It's big enough that you don't have to talk to the people around you and yet it's small enough for you to evesdrop if you want to. The "stools" are suspended and slide out from under the table and they have hooks under the table to hang your coats or shopping bags. Genius.
4. Friendly Staff
I've written a little about how much a friendly staff can enhance the experience at a store or a restaurant and this proves my point. They're super friendly and chirpy without being annoying. And since I went there 3 times in 2 days, we even had some nonsense conversations.
5. The Ice Cream
The first time I was there they passed around free samples of their vanilla ice-cream and I was sold. It's some of the best vanilla ice-cream I've had in a long time and the fudge sauce on it makes it even better, if that's possible.
6. The Hot-dogs themselves
I mean, it is a hot-dog place so why would I be raving about it if they had crap hot dogs? Yes, their hot-dogs are amazing. Beef, Turkey, Chicken, Pork or Lamb (they have a vegetarian version that substitutes two asparagus spears for the meat. Lame, but yet I have the urge to try it out just because it seems like this place can do no wrong). Good bread. Jalapeno-cheddar, truffle-gruyere, sundried tomato-feta or mint-yogurt sauce (the chimichurri isn't that good and I don't like horseradish). Mmmmmmmm
What's that you say? There must be something bad about the place? Well, I do provide objective opinions about everything so here's the part that could be negative.
1) It isn't open super late...yet. I asked them about it and they said they were going to extend the hours for summer time. So this will soon be removed from the "negatives" list.
2) Sadly, Dogmatic hasn't been able to screen their clientele very well. Some of the people there were kinda lame aka the two guys I was sitting opposite the first time I went there. They were talking about some weird nonsense and being loud and annoying.
3) The don't have a bathroom! This is the big downer. However, there's a Barnes and Noble a few feet away that has plenty.
Some call it meat with bread. Some call it gourmet fast food. Some call it a haute-dog. I just called it Magic. Plain and simple.
What is this Dogmatic nonsense you ask? I pity your ignorance - not for the sake of not knowing but for the sake of your stomach that has not yet experienced the pleasure of a Dogmatic dog. They call it the Gourmet Sausage System. But I think it's so much more. That three word tag-line, while catchy and all, hardly does justice to the joy that this place brings. Here's one of the many reasons why you should go to Dogmatic (I don't care where in the world you are):
1. The Wall Mural
It basically shows you the how the meat gets from the farm to Union Square. But no, it doesn't just show a pig, a slaughter-house, a sausage maker, a truck and the restaurant. Oh no no no. How silly of you to even think of such a thing you creativity-lacking fool. Robots carrying sausages, men lifting buildings, flying trucks dropping baguettes, oh my!
2. Home-made Sodas
The lemon-lime tastes like fresh-lime soda you get in India, the ginger soda tastes like really good ginger ale and the coconut tastes like nothing you've tasted before but something you wish you had invented.
3. The Communal Table
I'm not usually a fan of communal seating but they got it right. It's big enough that you don't have to talk to the people around you and yet it's small enough for you to evesdrop if you want to. The "stools" are suspended and slide out from under the table and they have hooks under the table to hang your coats or shopping bags. Genius.
4. Friendly Staff
I've written a little about how much a friendly staff can enhance the experience at a store or a restaurant and this proves my point. They're super friendly and chirpy without being annoying. And since I went there 3 times in 2 days, we even had some nonsense conversations.
5. The Ice Cream
The first time I was there they passed around free samples of their vanilla ice-cream and I was sold. It's some of the best vanilla ice-cream I've had in a long time and the fudge sauce on it makes it even better, if that's possible.
6. The Hot-dogs themselves
I mean, it is a hot-dog place so why would I be raving about it if they had crap hot dogs? Yes, their hot-dogs are amazing. Beef, Turkey, Chicken, Pork or Lamb (they have a vegetarian version that substitutes two asparagus spears for the meat. Lame, but yet I have the urge to try it out just because it seems like this place can do no wrong). Good bread. Jalapeno-cheddar, truffle-gruyere, sundried tomato-feta or mint-yogurt sauce (the chimichurri isn't that good and I don't like horseradish). Mmmmmmmm
What's that you say? There must be something bad about the place? Well, I do provide objective opinions about everything so here's the part that could be negative.
1) It isn't open super late...yet. I asked them about it and they said they were going to extend the hours for summer time. So this will soon be removed from the "negatives" list.
2) Sadly, Dogmatic hasn't been able to screen their clientele very well. Some of the people there were kinda lame aka the two guys I was sitting opposite the first time I went there. They were talking about some weird nonsense and being loud and annoying.
3) The don't have a bathroom! This is the big downer. However, there's a Barnes and Noble a few feet away that has plenty.
Some call it meat with bread. Some call it gourmet fast food. Some call it a haute-dog. I just called it Magic. Plain and simple.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Susu Research File #438957
In my last post I mentioned how I almost always order either ginger ale or bloody mary mix on an airplane but never on land. I spoke to a few people about it and apparently, this is something that a lot of people have noticed as well. Here I thought I had come up with an astute observation, but alas, I was not the first. This is similar to the time I thought I had discovered how to make fart sounds with my hands, only to realise that every 8 year old knew my magical discovery. But I digress. The stratospheric beverage anomaly (I might not have discovered it, but I have now named it. I win. I win.) got me thinking and I was determined to find out the true cause of this.
For ginger ale, the most convincing explanation I found was that ginger helped relieve queeziness that many people experience on airplanes. I don't know if it's an Indian thing but a little ginger juice or sucking on a piece of ginger is often prescribed to cure nausea. Ginger ale has ginger (at least in the name). Makes sense.
For bloody mary mix, on the other hand, the explanation that had me sold was that it can prevent you from getting DVT on an airplane. That's a good reason to drink tomato juice...living kinda rocks. However, I definitely don't order it for that reason and I'm sure most people that order it dont even know what DVT is. So that doesn't answer my question...why the hell do so many people oder bloody mary mix on planes???I personally just drink it because I like the taste. Here are a few reasons cited by peeps that I uncovered during my research:
1. It goes well with salty snacks like peanuts and pretzels (or do the peanuts and pretzels go well with the bloody mary mix? hmmm).
2. It's free on planes and more expensive than coke (the beverage, not the drug mr. one-track-mind) at a grocery store
3. It's a meal in a can
4. It mixes well with the vodka in my hip flask. I assumed that was what everyone else was doing too!
5. It makes you pee less than water does
6. It's like a quirky nerd - less popular, but more intriguing
7. I feel like I have to cuz the guy next to me always orders one
For ginger ale, the most convincing explanation I found was that ginger helped relieve queeziness that many people experience on airplanes. I don't know if it's an Indian thing but a little ginger juice or sucking on a piece of ginger is often prescribed to cure nausea. Ginger ale has ginger (at least in the name). Makes sense.
For bloody mary mix, on the other hand, the explanation that had me sold was that it can prevent you from getting DVT on an airplane. That's a good reason to drink tomato juice...living kinda rocks. However, I definitely don't order it for that reason and I'm sure most people that order it dont even know what DVT is. So that doesn't answer my question...why the hell do so many people oder bloody mary mix on planes???I personally just drink it because I like the taste. Here are a few reasons cited by peeps that I uncovered during my research:
1. It goes well with salty snacks like peanuts and pretzels (or do the peanuts and pretzels go well with the bloody mary mix? hmmm).
2. It's free on planes and more expensive than coke (the beverage, not the drug mr. one-track-mind) at a grocery store
3. It's a meal in a can
4. It mixes well with the vodka in my hip flask. I assumed that was what everyone else was doing too!
5. It makes you pee less than water does
6. It's like a quirky nerd - less popular, but more intriguing
7. I feel like I have to cuz the guy next to me always orders one
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